More than I dreamed
As I write this the rain is pounding on my roof top. My two babies are warm in bed fast asleep and the two older ones are creating a new world in mine craft . I have a hot coffee in my hand and a sound track playing that sings right to my soul. I love these moment. Moments of reflection. Moments where all the bad seems to fade away and for a moment the good seems to be the only parts that exist.
I scroll through my Instagram feed and feel so overwhelmed with love for the amazing women I have gotten to know. The lives I am now apart of and the many that allow me to speck into their season. When I decided to start Houseoferamiha it was simply to post the beautiful things I love, to encourage Mamas creating from home and to be inspired. This changed. So quickly. Along with all the good I saw, there was also cries for help. There was isolation and a sense that we were alone in this journey of Motherhood.
My heart has always been for Mothers. To remind them of how amazing they are. They have totally got this and are worth more then they could dream. They are beautiful. They are nurturers. They are chosen to birth precious tiny humans who rely on them for everything.
I couldn't sit back and comment here and there. I wanted to do more. I wanted to use my world in the hope that it will normalise the everyday. Out of love I hoped to inspire in some way and remind those that were reading that they were made for greater.
At 15 years old a school teacher told me I would only ever be a pregnant drop out. That moment crushed me and sent me spiralling out of control. I would never use this as an excuse for my actions because those actions belong to me but those words cut to my very core. I lost all self confidence and believed that I would never amount to more then I was at that moment. I gave up. I struggled with a cloud of depression that seemed would never pass and I looked for love where ever I could find it. I wanted to feel something, to feel anything even if it was hurt or rejection. I carried this belief with me everywhere I went. It was like a chain wrapped around my wrist. It refused to let me move forward. The moment I found out I was expecting my first child this chain smashed into a million pieces. Yes I was alone. I would go through my pregnancy, give birth to a beautiful child and raise him alone. But he gave me life. He gave me hope. He allowed me to see how strong I really was and how much I could overcome. My child restored so much in me as he grew inside of me. Over the years pain started to fade. I met the love of my life, had 3 more beautiful children and slowly I started to discover that the words that were spoken over me were just that. They were words. Yes they had power but I also had power to raise up and be the women I was always meant to be.
Why am I telling you all this? Well as Mums we are always our worst critics. We forget to look after ourselves and often overlook our needs and wants. We put our dreams aside in the beautiful pursuit to love our children. But how much more would life be if we as mothers chose to love ourselves, to see ourselves the way our children see us. As incredible love, as encouragers of dreams and pillars of strength. Our daughters would grow with a confidence that would impact the world and our sons would grow to see their wives as all they should be. Remember you. Remember how gracious and beautiful you are.
I want to thank you. Each and every one of you for being open. For being honest. For allowing us to follow your journey through the beautiful images we see. For being raw, for being real.
Motherhood is a crazy ride of making it from one day to the next while feeling our hearts burst with love. We get to do this ride together! We get to pick each other up, we get to cheer each other on. We have the power to say goodbye to judgment and chose to be there for one another.
I can't wait to see what's to come...